I shouldn’t need to say this, but I will. Everything in this post below this line is pure speculation, un-informed guesses or perhaps even straight-up bull… er baloney. So without further ado… Minnesota Beer predictions for 2007.
Brau Brothers Brewing Co. beer will arrive in the Twin Cities in 6-packs and kegs. They will deliver the first case to my house for, uh, quality control…
Finnegan’s… just pure speculation here, but we’re guessing that they’ll give a bunch of money to charity… and a bunch of beer to the folks at MNBeer.
Flat Earth Brewing Company will brew some kick-ass Belgian and/or farmhouse ales and bottle them in bombers and/or champagne-style bottles. One of their beers will have “Minnesota” in the name. Strangely enough, an elf will deliver their beer to my doorstep in the middle of the night.
Gluek Brewing Company will continue to be pimped by Dan Gladden during Twins games. When we ask nicely, they’ll arrange to give us a tour on a Saturday. See above post about delivery elves…
Lake Superior Brewing Company is going to dig out the wild rice for a new brew. The company purchases more firkins and Don starts showing up in the Twin Cities with cask-conditioned beers on a semi-regular basis. Again, remember the elves…
Mantorville Brewing Company will break into the Twin Cities market in full-force with a new pale ale made with a combination of Amarillo and Centennial hops… no, wait, maybe it’s an IPA. Due the overwhelming success, Tod closes St. Croix to concentrate on new beers and recipes. Again, strangely, this new beer ends up on my doorstep in the middle of the night. My supply runs low and it magically appears again. Who needs magic beans or a beanstock? I have delivery elves/gnomes/dwarves… whatever they are…
Pig’s Eye Brewing drops by MNBeer world headquarters one Friday even and proceeds to get us hammered. Feelings of deja vu arise, though I remember that I am no longer the 16-year-old getting sloshed on Pig’s Eye in the College Manor apartments on the campus of the FFCC in Fergus Falls.
August Schell… Dave Berg puts on a show this year at Bockfest where he jumps 2 live deer and a peacock on his bike. He wipes out but is saved by the “bock fairy” (what, you’ve never heard of her?) and her magical, seldom-seen quadruple-bock. When he is out cold, he is inspired to revamp the Zommerfest recipe with a new ale yeast (something like Wyeast’s Ardennes…) and lemongrass. Friends take to calling Dave “Evol.”
St. Croix – See above.
Summit Brewing Company puts their Amber on hold as well as their Pilsner and IPA. Their Alt makes a return and old fans finally stop bitching about the fact that it is no longer available. Summit introduces a Saison mid-summer and revamps the Pilsner recipe.
Surly Brewing Company – Two words. Imperial Furious. Local drinkers learn to order it by hand signals. (Stick your left pointer finger in the air and make a rough “F” with your pointer and middle fingers on your right hand). A New York Times article follows. They mis-quote us.
Barley John’s undergoes a small expansion. Local food critics wet themselves over new menu items. Chaos ensues.
Fitger’s Brewhouse invites Dave’s brother Mike to brew a batch of Masala Mama. Duluth fans rave for more. Beer fans rally and help pass legislation to allow brewpubs to sell their beer to distributors in Minnesota.
Granite City opens a number of new locations, including Bloomington and Minneapolis proper. A new, larger brewing facility is planned and/or built in the Twin Cities. The other location is reserved for seasonal beers.
Great Waters changes the name of their Mild, cuz a little bird told them that “Mr. Smooth” was cheesy. Unexpected food items are placed in the mash tun and result in excellent beers.
Green Mill Brewing Company gets more attention in 2007 thanks to involvement in the Minnesota Craft Brewer’s Guild and, uh, free pizza and beer for MNBeer readers…
The Herkimer surprises everyone with a highly-hopped IPA-like lager. People love it so much it becomes part of the regular line-up. It’s name? Duh. “The Prediction.” They also brew a steam beer which gets lots of attention.
Minneapolis Town Hall Brewery expands. Upward. …er… the crystal ball is hazy, folks… maybe they actually open a second location in the vicinity of the new Twins ballpark. Another cask is added to the line-up.
O’Gara’s totally revamps their brewery and surprises everyone.
O’Hara’s remodels and gets lots of attention for a new Imperial Porter that Chris brews.
Rock Bottom cranks adds a pulled beer to their line-up, much to everyone’s surprise. Men rejoice, ladies are so happy they cry, kids are jealous…
Wellington’s Backwater Brewing Company becomes a weekend destination for Minnesota beer geeks. Beer, barbecue and bowling? Yes. Parties ensue. Winona hotels are overbooked with Minnesota beer geeks.
MNBeer.com becomings a paying gig for two lucky sods. We’re all forced to work out daily, heavily, thanks to all of the free beer we’re forced to consume. Michael Jackson calls us for information on beers, wanting to know more about all of the great offerings in Minnesota.
In Minnesota, laws are passed to allow brewpubs to sell kegs to distributors. No less than 30 Minnesota bars carry at least three beers from Minnesota by the end of the year. Beer that was once only available to Minnesotans via travel to Wisconsin and beyond becomes available. Local brews, in turn, are sent far and wide. Two new brewpubs are opened as well as two new breweries.
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Okay, so one of these predictions is actually, mostly factual. Stay tuned in the new year to see which one is true. I’m not telling…